Coherent Dad

Not sure what brought Dad back to us for those few hours last weekend, but those few hours were amazing. The way he was crossing his legs, cracking jokes, talking to us about how great he is :) Back to the good ole' days. At one point I asked him, "Whats your name?" He looked at me and said "You dont know my name? Everyone knows my name!" Haha. So great to see that's still in him when his mind isn't "resting".

Love you Daddio. Looking forward to the next time you come back to us.

A walk down memory lane

The Car

Dad bought this exact car (different pic) from one of our neighbors for $500. This was at a time when he could've afforded something much better. But that was the type of guy he was. He never bought things for himself, instead focused his attention on family members. It was a great example to set for each of us.

Of course, Jay probably has the best stories on this one. He used to get dropped off to school in this beast.

Dad at home with the ladies

The Malibu

Dad loved his Malibu. He always talked about it. It was his first car and as far as influences go, this is where his love affair with cars started. Can you imagine dad rolling around in one of these bad boys. I can.

The Pantry at Chrisholm

I remember the first time we got home from Costco and filled our pantry up with boxes and boxes of food. Our pantry was full! I don't think it had ever been that full before, or possibly after. It was very satisfying for us to stack up all the cereal boxes and cookies in neat rows. More food than we would ever need. When we were finished putting away all the groceries I remember Dad came by and took a look at the pantry. He said, "It should always be this full."

I've always thought about that moment: the look on Dad's face has never left me. He was so proud of this achievement. As a kid I couldn't understand what there was to be proud of, as an adult I get it I just know I'll never understand it. I'll never understand the worth of a pantry full of food, because I've never had a hungry day in my life. Can you imagine how it must have felt for Dad to have accomplished: "All the food you can ever eat and then some", after years of struggling on the streets of Calcutta.

I always remember those years in Chrisholm as some of the best years of my life. I think they were some of Dad's too. His mind was still there, he could really begin to see the fruits of his labor, seven kids running around, a successful life in America. That moment at the pantry was culmination of years of hard work. I think Dad really felt like he'd made it that evening.

I wonder how he'd feel today? Seven grown successful kids. His real estate business steady and growing. Little grand daughters running around. Such a full life. Imagine if he'd never left Kamalpur?

Nyquil Induced Dad Dream

Yesterday I reading this post by a son who's father was also diagnosed with ALZ. He mentioned that the worst part about it was the fact that even though his Dad's was still alive, his memories with and about his Dad basically ended as soon as he was diagnosed with ALZ. That statement really hit home for me because the last memories I have of Dad are not when I saw him last Sunday, or when I will see him this upcoming Sunday, but of 2003 and older.

Anyway, I read this article as I took two cups of Nyquil and was about to go to sleep. (I am feeling under the weather even at this moment). Anyone who has ever taken medicine like Nyquil knows how weird your dreams can get and how you wake up remembering them with such great detail.

As you can guess, my dream was super bizarre. We were at Dad's funeral, open coffin, it was a viewing of him and it was in a lecture hall, full of people we didn't know but that he had touched. In the middle of a speech by some random, we (me and Anita) all of a sudden saw Dad get up from his coffin and just start walking out. I yelled "DAD!" Dad replied with "Hain, Beta. Let's go!" And we followed him just like that. Didn't even question his immortality. He strutted out of that lecture hall with his confident strut. We then took some back exits to the outside of the building, it was Mom, Dad, me and Anita. Dad looked at Mom and said "Are you Kunty?" to which Mom replied "Yes." And Dad said "Now I remember. I remember everything." We then walked outside and saw Sandhya, Pankaj, Jayant, Anju and Pinki playing in the snow. We joined in and it was like a Happy Ending to a movie. I woke up hearing the echos of his "Hain Beta." I can't remember the last time I heard him say that, but it was so loud and real in my dream.

I am not sure what that dream means, if anything...or maybe it just shows how weird I really am :) But I had this strong hope of Dad's immortality and maybe he would win the fight against Alzheimer's. I know that most likely he will not, but I woke up with a smile because even if it were just for those 2 minutes, I was with the Dad that I will always remember.

Strong, confident, immortal Dad.